I'm struggling in my writing career. I'm currently working on my second novel (the first is going to stay hog-tied for now) and I'm having the worst time trying to get a feel for the story. I have officially become bored with it.
I don't mean to say that I don't like the idea because I do. Kind of. I mean, when I thought it up originally I loved the idea. Then I tweaked it. And tweaked it some more. And on and on and on that went until I finally pinned down the story line. Kind of.
Yesterday I was feeling lost. I wanted to finish the first chapter for my Savvy U course. I've been dragging my feet on it for weeks now and I just finally wanted to get it done. So I tweaked it a few more times. Then I started feeling crabby, light-headed and anxious. I finally just posted it. The words were starting to blur at this point.
Then I walked away. I ate lunch, watched TV, drank some more coffee... Finally I checked back and saw that my instructor had taken a look at it. Oh my god! It totally sucked. She was too nice to say it but it really did. I didn't read all of her notes but the ones I read had me deciding one thing: I hated my first chapter.
That could only mean one thing: REWRITE!!! STAT!!!
So I waited a few more hours, just to get my thoughts in order. Then I opened Wordpad and went to work. First of all, I took her ideas into consideration. I then changed from third to first person POV. And then I wrote. And kept writing. And dammit if that didn't just feel great.
I was actually pleased with what I had written. It was a feeling I hadn't had in quite some time. The previous fits and starts I had were because as much as I wanted to deny it, I couldn't make myself get into my characters head. I think I was over-thinking the entire process when I should have just gone with my gut in the first place.
So yeah, I still think God is screwing with me. I broke the key off in my ignition this morning which means I can't go to work for the rest of the week. However, this might be his way of giving me the time I need to keep writing. I feel like I'm on a roll with this one.
So, thanks :)
